Somewhere over the rainbow

When I was asked to write this column, I said, “Yes, of course. When should I have it done?”

That’s what Democrats do. They work for the greater good. If I’m a straw man for that, so be it.

To rebut my fellow columnist, “The Wizard of Oz” was in fact written in support of populism, a word that puzzles and probably frightens Republicans. If today’s Republicans existed in 1900, they would have denounced the literary masterpiece as socialist and told the working poor to get back to the fields.

With that image in mind, I begin my list of the top “10 Reasons to be a young Democrat”

10. We have all the cool celebrities! Mark Zucker-who? If you want to rub elbows with the likes of Jay-Z and Beyoncé, join the Democrats. They held a fundraiser for President Barack Obama last election cycle. I heard Blue Ivy’s first words were “four more years.”

9. Welfare paying for iPhones? Not if Bill Clinton has anything to say about it. Our 42nd President, who enjoys record popularity by the way, passed the welfare reform bill of the last 30 years. To say anything against those in need is a downright Bush-league thing to do.

8. We’re a party of inclusiveness. I imagine the GOP’s treehouse placard to read: “No girls, no young’ns and absolutely no fun.” Whether you’re married to a dog or you just want to chase one, we accept all people because we understand that everyone just wants a chance to succeed.

7. I’ve heard somewhere that elephants never forget. Funny how the Republican Party forgets basic Constitutional principles like the separation of church and state.

6. Even though they profess “let freedom ring” every time they open their mouths, Republicans seem to think that less freedom means a better society. Ronald Reagan, revered as a demigod in Republican circles, gave amnesty to 3 million people. By my count, that’s 3 million more people to vote Republicans out of office.

5. Almost every day, I ask myself why my ancestors left Sweden. They have free health care, nice furniture and a severe lack of artery-clogging pizza.

4. The American Dream is alive and well in America for those who can build it themselves. An essential part of the American Dream is education, infrastructure and a social structure of progressiveness. Sorry, but you didn’t build America yourself, and you would know that if you got your news from anywhere else other than Fox News.

3. It’s really easy to forget, but Republicans lost the last election. The way they speak of it now it seems like a fluke, an error never to be repeated. Mitt Romney got 47 percent (yes, you read that right), a whopping 47 percent of the popular vote.

2. Republicans may be happier, but what that poll doesn’t say is that Democrats and Independents are more worried about their neighbor. While Republicans throw their money around, Democrats are out there trying to make the world a better place, one person at a time.

1. We have Hillary Rodham Clinton. Enough said.

 

Reach the columnist at peter.northfelt@asu.edu or follow him on Twitter at @peternorthfelt

 

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