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It's the night before your most important final. The library is packed. There's only one empty seat, and it's at a table with these five people. Good luck!

Overly Prepared Girl

She has a six-inch hot pink binder. On the cover of the binder is a colored pencil drawing of a unicorn. Inside the binder are nine dividers — one for each of the courses she’s taking this semester. In the pockets of the binder are about 600 color coded notecards. Each one of the note cards is completely covered in microscopic print. Fortunately for her, she has a magnifying glass in her backpack. 

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"Thinks He Can Learn Everything at the Last Minute" Guy

He hasn’t bothered to go to class all semester, except for exam days. Now he desperately needs to do well on the final, but he doesn’t know any of the material. He went to the tutoring center earlier in the evening, hoping some super smart kid who took the class last year would be able to teach him 16 weeks worth of content in one night. Since that strategy has failed him, he's urgently calling every single person he knows in the class asking for help.

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"Needs 117 Percent to Pass the Class" Guy

“I got this,” he tells his friend. “Test-taking is 90 percent deductive reasoning.” He isn’t quite sure what deductive reasoning is, but at least he sounds like he knows what he’s talking about. He stares blankly at the study guide for a few minutes. "Maybe these same questions will be on the test," he says. "I'm just going to memorize the answers to this, and hope they'll be useful tomorrow." He stares at the paper for a little while longer. "I give up. I'm not even gonna take the test," he says. He storms out of the library, and is never seen at ASU again. 

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"Way Too Stressed Out" Girl 

She just can't calm down no matter what she does. She's tried everything — bubble wrap, Play-Doh, petting a dog, eating way too much. At this point, the only thing for her to do is wait it out. She'll be fine. Eventually.  

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"Only Needs 5 Percent To Keep His A" Guy

He's binge watching "House of Cards" on his laptop, just like he's been doing for the past four days. You wonder why he's even in the library and not in his bed. Perhaps if you only had worked a little bit harder (or maybe a lot harder), you could have been in his position right now. But sadly, you didn't work harder. Maybe next semester you will.

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Related links:

Finals week prep: 6 study spots near Tempe campus

5 ways to de-stress in downtown Phoenix


Reach the columnist at cmfitzpa@asu.edu or follow  @CodyFitzStories on Twitter.

Editor’s note: The opinions presented in this column are the author’s and do not imply any endorsement from The State Press or its editors.

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