From the title, I’m sure you can understand what this blog is going to be about. The pressures, both external and internal, that a person with anxiety goes through.
A big part of this is being able to not only focus on anxiety, but other mental disorders. Without coverage and consideration, I believe some people may never feel like their voice or their perspective is being heard. That is where I’d like to step in. I will be giving some context and facts on these disorders as well as find people who have tips for college from that perspective.
On the topic of anxiety, I have had anxiety since I was about 8-years-old due to bullying and stress at a young age and over time my anxiety has fluctuated from good to bad.
As a sophomore in college, I am happy to say that I have a handle on my anxiety now more than ever. I do still get occasional panic attacks and find menial tasks more difficult to do with limited time, but both my family and I can see how much better I manage my anxiety in stressful situations.
I cannot necessarily say the same for Freshman Maya. I was an out of state student and I had never been on my own before, which is a common case for many college freshmen. However, the ability to have my own free space and manage my own time put an invisible blanket of pressure on me that I hadn’t anticipated.
Within the year I had cried more times than I had all of high school. Honestly, I felt more emotionally drained from anxiety than ever before.
This is not being said to scare you. This is to show that different experiences have a different impact on many people. They can make or break even the strongest person in the simplest situations. That being said, I am not the strongest person and freshmen year of college is not the simplest situation.
My growth in the year that I have been in college until now is something that makes me proud. Not only that, but I have amazing friends that I have made in the past year that will tell me how far I’ve come in terms of being socially interactive and having a better grip on my thoughts and actions in stressful situations.
It is being able to reflect on your best and worst moments and having a positive outlook for even better moments that determines true strength to me. My lowest lows will be talked about on this blog and I promise they are not flattering. Yet, I can proudly say that those lows are few and far between. There are more frequent and longer lasting highs that I can focus on. Which is a great thing considering a year ago I would have never spoken like this.
A year ago, I would have never thought I’d be writing a blog and seeking a similar career path. I would have seen myself as a poor source of advice and perspective. Now, although I still may not have a plethora of great advice and perspective, I’m willing to share my story and those of other people in order to help college students and anybody who needs help to find a melting pot of disorders and mental issues that people seem too timid to talk about.
The truth of the matter is everybody gets stressed, everybody feels insecure, and everybody has lows. However, when you constantly feel this way it takes a toll on you and makes you feel very secluded.
My goal is to make it a little easier. I don’t think that I can fix you nor do you need to be fixed. But maybe some reflection and added perspective can make you feel a little less isolated in your bubble.
Anyways, until next time.
An Anxious College Girl
