There’s a lot of different ways to look at dorm life.
Some students romanticize the time spent in their respective concrete tower: “It’s just like summer camp — except it lasts for nine fun-filled months!”
These students quickly adopt a Camp Crystal Lake mentality. They spend a lot of time by the pool, sunning themselves. They work out every day in the Student Recreation Complex and will occasionally attend an arts and crafts class.
Unfortunately, not every Sun Devil adjusts so easily to dwelling in a cell. Some students cast the rose-colored glasses aside and accept their prison sentence. “I am 18 years old, and I sleep in a bunk bed. My countertops are canary yellow, and they won’t let me have a toaster,” the pessimistic student can be heard muttering through the halls of Manzanita.
In light of their prison sentence, these students adopt a uniform, either sweatpants and a sweatshirt (washing optional) or “all-black” if the student is artsy and misguided. They slip vodka into their morning coffee and curl up into a ball on the bottom bunk at night, trying to drown out the sounds of their roommates getting lucky overhead.
But maybe the problem isn’t their roommates, or being so far away from home, or even wearing clothes that haven’t been washed in weeks. Maybe all these students need is a little feng shui to brighten up their day.
OK, while I don’t know much about the Chinese art of decorating your home according to Yin and Yang, I do know where any student can find a giant, plastic, neon pink, hand-shaped chair, which is certain to liven up any prison cell/dorm room.
Go Kat Go
Located at 4832 W. Glendale Ave., Glendale, Go Kat Go is home of the aforementioned hand chair. For a stiff $179.99, you too can lounge in retro luxury, cupped in a giant plastic hand. Or why not throw a little dorm room barbeque? For $450, you can head back to ASU with an original 70s ball barbeque in tow. They say no toasters, but I’ve never come across any rule prohibiting a barbeque in your dorm room.
While those prices may seem a little steep, Go Kat Go — which specializes in hot rod and juvenile delinquent paraphernalia, smoking and drinking collectibles, as well as retro home furnishings — does have plenty of merchandise for the starving college student.
Brandi Swanberg, who owns the establishment along with husband Chris Swanberg, assures us that anyone working with any budget can take something home from Go Kat Go.
According to Swanberg, tiki items are immensely popular right now. And conveniently enough, Go Kat Go has every student’s tiki bar needs, with tiki glasses starting around $8. And what’s a dormitory without a tiki bar, serving up Kool Aid cocktails to residents well into quiet hours?
Urban Outfitters
Everyone knows that a dorm room is not a dorm room without a light-up plastic gnome. Lucky for us, Tempe’s own Urban Outfitters, 545 S. Mill Avenue, has all the gnome lamps any dormitory could dream of. And let’s not forget the deer lamps, the duck lamps and non-glowing pink flamingos for good measure.
For the more practical student, Urban Outfitters also has chairs. Elizabeth Hutchison, UO’s housewares team leader and ASU nursing student, says the butterfly chairs are literally flying out of the store right now.
Ideal for any dorm room, the fold-up butterfly chair is sold in two parts: the metal frame ($29) and canvas cover (starting at $26). Also popular for the back-to-school season, Hutchinson says, is the store’s fold-up, padded leisure chair ($55).
The spinning mirror ball is an additional necessity, which at $16 will quickly convert any dorm room into a virtual Studio 54. And don’t forget to pick up a tapestry to hang over your window. Tapestries are a stylish way to block out the intrusive sun the morning “after.”
Hutchinson says Urban Outfitters is also great for “the little things,” such as picture frames, candles (shhhhh!), and ashtrays (double shhhh!).
And if your roommate is getting on your nerves, you can always pick up a beaded curtain for $24. Simply use the curtain to divide your dorm room in half, ensuring that you get the side with the bathroom and the door. Explain to your roommate that he or she must now exit the room through the window and defecate in the bushes. If he is a reasonable human being, he is certain to understand and respect your new rules.
Target
For the more Spartan student, Target, located on the northeast corner of McClintock and Baseline roads in Tempe, will certainly get your dorm room in order. Plastic organizers start at $7, and you can even pick up a trendy, oversized alarm clock for $9.99.
Of particular interest is the cocktail light box ($19.99), which when plugged in features a glowing martini. While it’s not a tiki bar or a rotating disco ball, it does signal a good time. Its eerie, incandescent glow will undoubtedly draw herds of zombie-students to your dorm room, on the prowl for sweet, sweet liquor.
However, let’s not overlook the multi facets of Target. Here, we can stock up on school supplies, electronic equipment and fuel-providing junk food. And most importantly, Target offers us with a vast selection of video and board games.
Who says dorm life needs to be drink-til-you-puke-why’s-this-cigarette-butt-in-my-ear-and-whose-room-am-I-waking-up-in-anyway fest? At Target, you can pick up the non-deluxe version of Scrabble for a mere $11.99 (sorry folks, no rotating board at this price). Dorm-wide Scrabble tournament, anyone? I guess you could take a shot of Jack Daniels for every vowel you put down in a turn, but that’s not my suggestion.
