Dysfunction has claimed yet another historical action-duo.
When a long-standing disagreement to fully pardon Scooter Libby, the former vice-presidential chief of staff indicted for revealing the identity of a CIA operative, boiled over, the George W. Bush-Dick Cheney crazy-train relationship effectively derailed in the last months of the Bush Administration.
Alright, well, nearly everyone has found themselves at the end of a relationship, once seemingly brimming with promise that has tragically turned destructively dysfunctional. Bush and Cheney are no different; while no one is entirely free of blame, oftentimes in these relationships, there is an “aggressor” and a “victim.”
George W. Bush is a victim. If the decisions of his administration reveal anything, he’s often the victim of his own circumstances and of listening to Cheney’s bad advice. W’s relationship with Cheney has, in more ways than not, really hurt Bush more than it’s hurt Cheney.
Going all the way back to 2005, when the Iraq War was going terribly but Americans were being reminded by administration officials (notably the VP) on a daily basis that everything was hunky-dory, apparently the lies weren’t just limited to the general public.
Cheney was also telling Bush a very similar message, and when W. began to realize Cheney’s meaning of “staying the course” was synonymous with “a lot of people dying,” a light bulb (or, perhaps more appropriately, a candle) lit up inside Bush’s head: Maybe Dick really didn’t know what he was talking about after all.
Fast-forward to post-2006 mid-term elections. Cheney had been relegated to a much less prominent role in policy-making (certainly so in comparison to the first four years), and Bush was increasingly listening to advice from the new secretary of defense Robert Gates, and the commander in Iraq, General David Petraeus.
You know, advice based on analysis and debate instead of, well, whatever Cheney uses to make decisions. Coin tosses? Clouds? The dark side of the Force?
Eventually, Bush made the realization that Cheney had been wrong … a lot. The pressure from the VP to pardon Scooter Libby was merely the finishing touch on a dysfunctional relationship fated from the start.
While I’ve never met either of these men (and, really, would rather not), I’m no stranger to dysfunctional relationships in whatever form they may take, and feel as though I can offer advice to both parties.
To Dick Cheney: Sir, quite frankly, you’re an ass. I recommend spending less time alone with your artillery gun collection and more time reconnecting with humanity. Volunteer at a soup kitchen or tutor kids having trouble at math. Basically, Dick, when you realize not everybody’s out to get you, I guarantee life will get a lot easier.
And to George W.: OK, you’ve listened to some bad advice. We’ve all done it, and thankfully, that advice only ruined a country and killed thousands of people. No big deal, right? Wrong. But oh well, you’re retired now. Enjoy Crawford, Laura’s apple dumplings and getting the band back together. You’ve earned it.
Ultimately, guys, take a break from each other. Preferably a permanent one, because when two dysfunctional people get together, it’s not only their lives that are affected, but the lives of those around them: family, friends, coworkers or innocent civilians.
Alex is not a Bush apologist and can be reached at
alexander.petrusek@asu.edu.
