We are inexorably affected by life; it goes on, in almost clockwork motion.
However, as I come of age, I see that not all is as harmonious as it seems. An individual, who by outward appearance lives a contented life, may be living an entirely different existence in their own heart and mind.
They live in quiet despair. They live a life they did not actually choose themselves.
For whatever reason, many do not choose their paths. By social or familial pressure, or by inner doubt, individuals are either forced into a life path, or allow themselves to fall into one.
They succumb to fear, internal or external.
Many Americans live in charmed circumstances. We are seemingly removed from the fight for survival, from the visceral fear of the external world.
But fear, in any form, is universal. The individual who lives with external fear and the individual who lives with internal fear are both not where they wish to be. Yet one who is afraid of something outside of the self has a focus; they know what to avoid. One who is afraid of the self, of the internal — they cannot avoid who they are. So they are paralyzed, even in a rich and safe society.
People are afraid to ask questions, not of their world, but of their relation to it. They are afraid of their pain, afraid of their potential failure and ultimately, afraid of their own truths.
They are afraid of their unknown, natural selves.
Over these past four years, I have learned there is a dividing line between adolescence and adulthood. It is the moment we no longer allow others to choose our lives for us and instead choose our own destinies.
This is not easy. Self-choice requires courage, but it is slow and steady. Yet an unexamined, un-chosen life will always possess an element of fear, because it is based in personal uncertainty.
Uncertainty, after all, breeds fear. Choice, and the certainty it brings, builds courage.
So the process of self-choice begins with a few simple questions. Ask yourself: Who am I, independent of outside influence? Where have I come from? What am I capable of?
Be honest and relentless in your answers. Find your truths, feel them and express them. Thereafter, your external life will soon reflect who you naturally are, and where you wish to go. Contentment emanates from this.
Self-choice is not, however, an indulgent, egocentric process. It is a duty we must all fulfill; it is our responsibility to ourselves, yes, but also to our communities and society at large. We would all like to build a society upon personal truth and courage but to do so we must first build it in ourselves.
So, while we may be affected by life, we have the power to affect it just the same. We have the power to choose ourselves, and live in truth.
Exercise your power to its fullest.
In a wave Alex says goodbye, but can be reached at alexander.petrusek@asu.edu
