Persistence can be a great tool when trying to get that big job or someone to forgive you. However, one area there shouldn’t be persistence is in relationships - at least not in the beginning stages of dating.
If I have learned anything from past relationships, it’s that there is a dating game and, even if you don’t like it, you have to play it. Men like a chase, and there is nothing more annoying to a guy than a girl who is overly persistent. But that doesn’t mean girls don’t get the same way. Guys, if a girl isn’t texting back it’s because she doesn’t want to date you.
I have a friend who is always persistent when she meets a new guy. She will get his number and be the first to text him, which is perfectly OK. However, when she doesn’t get a response back, she texts him again. After a few weeks of this, she asked me how to get this guy to like her. I didn’t know how to tell her that his aloofness was because she wouldn’t leave him alone. I won’t lie, I’ve been in her shoes, and I eventually had to learn persistent texts didn’t make someone want to date me.
We all hate that person who continues to text or call when we’re clearly not interested. You probably know the type. There is the person who will resend the same text when you don’t respond the first time, and the person who will text you every single night to see if you want to hang out but doesn’t get the message after the ninth excuse.
Here is the simple advice I have for you persistent texters: Whether you are a guy or girl, if someone likes you he or she will text you back. No ifs, ands or buts.
When a girl likes a guy, she sits around her phone and waits for his text. So, guys, if a girl doesn’t try to hang out with you or even respond to a polite text, it’s a clear sign.
I also know that if a guy is into a girl, he will find a way to talk to her. Hell or high water, he will make some kind of attempt to contact her. So if a guy doesn’t text, go out and meet someone who will try to talk to you. Why waste time on someone who doesn’t even want to text you?
Next time you’re in this situation, think before you keep texting. Ask yourself if you would be annoyed if it were the other way around.
Has persistence ever worked for you? E-mail Lindsey at lindsey.kupfer@asu.edu and follow her relationship columns online at statepress.com
