Divorce is everywhere. I recently heard that a guy I used to know is getting divorced. He graduated high school with me in 2007. Without even being married a year, they are already divorced.
It seems that divorce is the answer to most relationship problems.
Don’t get me wrong, spousal abuse and infidelity are solid reasons to leave someone, but it seems that people are more willing to let their marriage fall to the wayside these days instead of attempting to seek out help to fix smaller communication problems.
According to The Huffington Post, in an attempt to keep their high divorce rates down, Wyoming is trying to pass a new law that requires couples to go through three hours of counseling before the marriage and when ending it.
If a couple fails to complete the session, the state will force them to wait a year before they can get married or divorced.
Is this against the constitutional rights of people to make them do this? More than likely, yes. Especially when two people really dislike each other at the end of a relationship, it would be a long three hours.
However, this isn’t the first state to pass laws like this. “Families: A Sociological Perspective” by David M. Newman talks about how Georgia implicated a waiting period for couples wanting to divorce. Hoping that 120-180 days will give them time to think about what they are doing before quickly ending it.
Other states, like Florida, offer discounts on marriage licenses if they take a pre-marital course.
While it seems unfair to force therapy on a couple, I actually like the idea of it. If the therapy includes pre-marital counseling, then it’s a good way to learn how to communicate better and to talk about important issues that come with marriage.
If you really love each other then talking to each other for three hours shouldn’t be a big deal. It would actually help to get to know that person even better than you did before.
The three hour divorce session is an even better idea because even if it doesn’t fix your problems, it gives you time to talk about issues that you were probably avoiding before the divorce.
For some couples it could even solve the issues and let them learn to communicate better, especially if they have children together. It has a huge impact on children when their parents separate and can’t even talk to each other without yelling.
The idea that marriage is a dying institution has become a widespread view. A study by the Pew Research Center last year reported that 4 in 10 people think that marriage is becoming obsolete.
Call me old-fashioned, but one day I still hope to find someone that I can spend my life with. Statistics like this make people give up their dream of finding the right person.
While I’m realistic about dating, I hope that marriage can bounce back and become less about joint incomes and tax cuts and more about being with someone you care about. Maybe then the divorce rates would decrease, even if only a little.
Lindsey can be reached at lskupfer@asu.edu
