‘Waiting For Forever’ is creepy, unromantic

Rating: 0.5 Starring: Rachel Bilson, Tom Sturridge, and Richard Jenkins Rated: PG-13 Release Date: February 11, 2011

Women typically enjoy flowers, candy or tacky heart-clad teddy bears for Valentine's Day, but this year actor-turned-director James Keach thought it would be a good idea to switch things up. Debuting the weekend before the most romantic day of the year, why not the melodramatic tale of a juggler/mime stalker?

Of course, there has to be a horror film every year paired alongside all the chick flicks that come with February. Wait — what's that? It's not a horror film? It's a love story? About a stalker?

Nothing says first date like showing how a creepy, mentally-ill man can, too, get the girl of his dreams. "Waiting for Forever" is by far the most histrionic, corny, and creepy story of 2011. Throw 2010 in the comparison, too. This movie takes the awkward cake.

Opening with a flip book style montage of credits and flashbacks, the movie immediately moves into an attempted indie style, copying successful films like "500 Days of Summer." We meet Will Donner (Tom Sturridge), a mid-twenties, child-like man sporting a derby hat, vest, hoop earing, Converse shoes, and plaid pajamas. As he hitchhikes along unspecified highways, he shares his story of love for childhood friend Emma Twist (Rachel Bilson), now a Hollywood actress. After he moved away to live with other family members, Will and Emma lost touch. Correction: Emma lost touch. Will has now made his life around street performing wherever Emma moves to. Without speaking in over a decade, the doe-eyed juggler has gotten word that the actresses father (Richard Jenkins) is sick and she has decided to return home, taking a break from her lack-luster television show and murderous boyfriend (Matthew Davis).

The audience, now brought to Anytown, USA, now sees that Will's brother Jim (Scott Mechlowicz) has since moved back to their childhood town, become a banker and is embarrassed by his little brother's obsessive habits. The movie from this point takes forever to get the actual story going and instead finds necessity in too many subplots that result in awkward murders, sicknesses, fights and discussions about income tax.

As Will reveals his love to Emma, the movie should have taken a direct turn for the horror genre. But instead, it's Bilson's character who does most of the apologizing. I guess some people are feel unworthy of creepy obsessions.

From here on, Will, asked to stop, leaves in a puppy-like manner and clues of his possibly mental instability set in further. What should be longing glances at his crush are actually ridiculously eerie and frightening . His heavy breathing and child-like handwriting are not cute and endearing like all his passers-by think, but remind me of Asperger's syndrome.

The movie continues in such an odd direction that throws seasoned actors, Richard Jenkins and Blythe Danner, completely under the bus with tired, foot-deep characters and writer Steve Adams continues to tell a tale with the worst moral ever: Stalking is cute. If you keep it up and have a pathetic enough back story, you'll get the girl in the end.


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