A few weeks ago I saw the movie "Happy Feet" because, to be completely honest, I think penguins are adorable.
I was disappointed, however, to find that the liberal agenda was not propagandized nearly enough. Perhaps Michael Moore and Al Gore needed to have an integral role in the production of the film.
Either way, the children's movie was underpoliticized and, frankly, left much to be desired in the brainwashing of our nation's prepubescent population.
Now that I have your attention, let me draw it to a letter to the editor in Friday's Arizona Republic.
Gilbert resident Bonnie Colvin submitted a letter condemning the new family box-office hit "Happy Feet."
She felt it was pro-science, anti-religion, pro-homosexuality and that there were far too many references to promiscuity.
"The film was so top-heavy with every plank of the classic liberal agenda," Colvin said. "The film presents a picture of contempt for traditional family values."
Let me first address her pro-science stigma. The film does hint at problems with global warming, pollution and humanization of nature.
Liberal or not, everyone should be concerned with the welfare of our planet and its effects on wildlife. It is not a bipartisan issue; it's global.
"Happy Feet" does not come across as anti-religious. If anything, it merely suggests progress and the modernization of religion. It isn't God that punishes show-stopping penguins at the fault of a tap-dancing chick, but rather what appear to be oil companies and manufacturing conglomerates.
And the irresistible main character Mumble - a tap-dancing penguin - is not a homosexual. Assuming a tap dancer is homosexual is the worst kind of typecasting. And just because his character is the outcast in society and the only one who's different does not turn him into an allusion to the homosexual community.
It seems that these days, when an outsider is portrayed in a children's movie, the film is assumed to be promoting an alternative lifestyle.
Penguins grooving to Prince's "Kiss" mixed with a round of "Let's talk about eggs, baby. Let's talk about you and me" was quite surprising (and hilarious), but I don't think it encouraged promiscuity.
In fact, the film was incorrect in the way that it portrayed emperor penguins' mating rituals. It depicted the penguins as monogamous, mating with one partner for life, when penguins normally mate with one partner per mating season.
But ultimately, my point is that "Happy Feet" is a children's movie. It was made to entertain and educate a G-rated audience about the fictional world of Julliard-worthy aquatic birds.
Any mature content or possible political bias was intended for adults and only understood by adults - or at least by pimply youngsters who've already learned that something is amok in American politics.
The references to modern-day issues were subtle enough that a child wouldn't even be aware of them, and if all this woman saw were a spillover of political agenda and disdain for family values, then I'd hate to see how she views the rest of the world.
I mean really, even something as mundane as traffic could be scrutinized as political agenda.
Those who drive in the left lane are left-wing, those who drive in the right lane are right-wing and those who stay in the middle or frequently change lanes are moderates.
Anyone driving a sport utility vehicle despises the thought of alternative fuels. Hummer drivers are homophobic, since they feel the need to prove their manliness with such a monstrous vehicle, and obviously favor pro-military involvement anywhere undemocratic.
Anything in the world, from the humdrum to the extraordinary, can be viewed as having ulterior motives or an agenda if that's what you're looking for.
But if all you can get out of an entertaining family movie is bias and disrespect for family values, you are in a sad state.
Kirsten Keane is a journalism sophomore who does not believe that penguins are the root of all liberal ideals. Contact her at: Kirsten.Keane@asu.edu.
