Whilst enjoying your breakfast Monday morning, you ever so innocently update your Twitter feed. You chuckle at the silliness of obscure objects on the heads of unsuspecting animals and roll your eyes at countless grammar errors, as per usual. But suddenly you scroll to something terrible, blasphemous and completely out-of-bounds: a “Breaking Bad” spoiler from yesterday night. You’re only up to season 3 on Netflix, and this tweet is more than a plot twist.
Disappointed and emotionally scarred, you contemplate giving up on the series as your inner existentialist asks, “What’s the point?”
Well, you hopped on the bandwagon too late and this is what you get. Why should anyone shelter you from such heartbreak? You had it coming, and this kind of thing is inevitable — or is it?
Never fear, you poor unfortunate soul. Netflix feels your pain and wants to reach out a helping hand to block such content from your personal "Twittersphere."
With the launch of Spoiler Foiler, this Netflix sponsored-solution acts as your personal shield against the unexpected “Breaking Bad” spoilers that may appear on your feed. Any tweet involving “danger words” to late-bloomers will be blacked out and only available for viewing upon your approval.
Aren’t the Heisenberg chronicles coming to a close, though?
Well, Netflix knows the story of the bandwagoner all too well. It anticipates the desire of late viewers to tweet its astonishments and expectations, despite the fact that all the plot twists and excitement have already been seen by millions of other viewers.
There is something to be said about the development of a shield to the eyes of second-rate "Breaking Bad" fans. Netflix is near and dear to the hearts of many — and it knows it. With nearly 38 million members in 40 countries, the addiction to watching movies and TV weeks, months or even years after shows premiere (or end) is prevalent.
Although there are countless painfully poor documentaries and movies that never made it to the big screen for a reason, Netflix is a safe place for those who hadn’t given Walter White and Jesse Pinkman a second thought until last month, when your best friend’s brother started counting down to the beginning of the end of the series.
Netflix tells you: Don't be embarrassed, dedicate a couple weekends to us and voilà. No more pretending to know what you’re talking about a fateful Sunday night.
As the Invisible Hand of Netflix guides you through pop-culture television and shields your virgin “Bad” eyes, we have to wonder: Will they give the fans of other new shows the same special treatment?
If not, maybe cut the real-time viewers a break. It’s not their fault you can’t keep up.
Reach the columnist at haley.tonetti@asu.edu or follow her on Twitter @haleytonetti
