Left. Right. Left. Left up. Right down. Or should it be right up and left down? Crap. Both feet. Hold it. Crap. Left...
In shopping mall arcades all over the world, people can be found jumping up and down and moving their feet in bizarre patterns. They seem to be entranced by the hypnotizing frenzy of colorful imagery and mediocre dance mixes. Maybe you're one of them, trapped in the "Dance Dance Revolution" craze.
Hey, it happens to the best of us. Maybe you've bought the game. Maybe you own the floor mat. Maybe you've made up elaborate dances because the fact that there isn't any true "dancing" going on bothers you. If you're a wanna-be journalist, you might even argue the phrase "Dance Dance Revolution" (translated from Japanese) is gramatically incorrect. If you're like me, your love for the game is a guilty secret you've been hiding for far too long. Relax: You're not alone. There are others like you - a heck of a lot of them.
Other fans are out there, working to make sure you can access the game on your computer. Somebody took the time to create FlashFlashRevolution, a Flash adaptation of DDR you can play online. It's kind of like playing the console video game version of DDR on a game pad, rather than on the floor mat. One need only mash the arrow keys on a computer keyboard, hopefully at the right time. The game seems almost pointless without a floor mat, but it's still addictive.
The main problem is the game performs poorly in terms of speed and ease of navigation on my Starving Student Test Machine. First, I needed to have the proper Flash plug-in. Then, to play a song for the first time, I had to wait for the song to load. This can take two to three minutes, even on a quote-unquote high-speed connection.
To be fair, I give the webmasters points for having so much material online and serving so many DDR-starved computer aficionados out there. And it's true that once the song is loaded, the cache files remain and visitors don't have to wait so long again. When dealing with the Internet, inconveniences abound. The quality of the game makes up for it.
FFR is still of better quality than 99 percent of all of the crummy arcade games posted on the Internet right now. I recommend starting out with the easier levels to get the feel for FFR on a keyboard, the difficulties of which are marked by a certain number of crescents in the song description. All sorts of no-name club, hip-hop, dance, rock and funk songs appear. A few remixes of well-known RPG and other game classics appear in the Arcade song list. Notable songs include the "Final Fantasy VII" battle music and songs from "Mega Man" and "Legend of Zelda."
Registration is strongly encouraged to fully use the site, but it's not necessarily a bad thing. By logging in, you can access your ongoing scores no matter what computer you are using. Unfortunately, I was spontaneously logged out at one point. Be careful to watch to see if you are logged in or not. In my case, my awesome score and credits on a particularly good run were not logged into my score. Of course, my score couldn't even touch the scores of the pros. Some people spend hours doing this, and I pity the fools. And I pity the fools in charge of this site - and the programmers - because they keep having to issue new beta versions. And for free. The site is more than just a game.
Other features include FFR Radio, a Winamp stream that contains music straight from FFR. There is also a forum and a chat area that contains people mainly talking about DDR. I have to say, the forum is one of the most well-maintained I have seen. It contains a "dead topics" area and a "garbage bin" for flame wars and more. Other forums remain, at least in theory, clean for talking about DDR, FFR, video games and other somewhat nerdy pursuits. To sum it up, check it out if you don't mind registering and getting a screen name.
Now it's time to end this story so I can get back to playing the game.
Pointer finger left, middle finger up, ring finger right, middle finger down, pointer and ring finger together... Crap.
Nicole Saidi is still trying to master the "Final Fantasy VII" battle theme. Reach the Content Editor at nicole.saidi@asu.edu and she'll get back to you later.
